To be a goth on the inside, you don’t have to wear a lot of eyeliner or have sex in a cemetery. I’ve spent years ruminating on mortality and the meaninglessness of life, but in a lighthearted manner. My existence is like a loose garment on me! I’ll raise my arms and whirl and grin like I’m in a shampoo commercial when the cold hand of death arrives pointing its bony finger at me.
Listen, everyone lives and dies. Everything you’ve done, spoken, or been concerned about will be forgotten. You may even return as a different person, having forgotten about yourself. What I mean is that what makes life so amusing is how useless everything is! Isn’t it hilarious?
In This Article...
Aries: Jet-Ski Accident
When an Aries takes their last breath, you can expect they’ll do so quickly. Whether they die on a jet ski, a motorcycle, or in the middle of some very fast rebound sex, their death is sure to be a show-stopper; an Expiration Celebration, if you will. They will die like they lived: joyfully and without fear.
Taurus: Buried Alive
Taurus people are devoted to their possessions. We can’t say that we blame them. With their cherub cheeks, large eyes, and charming trinkets, they’re incredibly cute folks. They collect things like germs on a first-grader, and getting rid of them could take a reality TV team or perhaps an exorcism. Unless, of course, you’re too late and Taurus is discovered clutching a dead cat beneath a stack of dusty books and antique cooking spoons.
Gemini: Hands Bitten Off
Every astrological sign has a ruling bodily part. It’s the hands for Gemini. Geminis are naturally curious and want to touch things. If you take them to the zoo on a date, they’ll reach into the monkey house’s bars and have their hands ripped off. You can read this article while they bleed out. Do it as soon as possible, before their life force runs out. Geminis excel at multitasking, thus bleeding heavily while listening to a story will appeal to them. They’ll most likely appreciate the distraction.
Cancer: Falling Of The Roof, Yelling, I’LL FIX IT MYSELF!
Cancer, you’re far too reliant on yourself. I know you believe no one can match your abilities, but the truth is that many individuals can. There are many people who are far more capable than you.
Most likely, you’ll die attempting a task you’re not qualified to complete, such as patching a hole in your roof because “everyone is trying to rip you off,” or self-medicating mood stabilizers because “treatment is too expensive.” On the plus side, you can use the money you saved playing Mr. Fix-It to pay for your own funeral.
Leo: Hair Stuck In Subway Doors, Mid-Flirtatious Gesture
People may think you’re arrogant, but you’re not, Leo. You’re just incredibly attractive, and you’re well aware of it. But be wary of those lovely looks; recall how Narcissus drowned while admiring at his mirror in the water? You could have been the one. Nobody bothers to gaze at nature anymore.
You’re more likely to take a selfie while crossing an intersection or flip your lovely hair over your shoulder, directly into the subway car’s shutting doors. Isn’t it messy?
Virgo: Dies of Undiagnosable Stress-Rash
Virgo, are you uneasy? You certainly are! It’s not like anyone would notice. You’re not the sort to have an emotional breakdown. Virgos don’t wear their emotions on their sleeves; instead, they manifest as hives, migraines, or indigestion on the inside of their bodies. You’re not going to throw a tantrum like a child; instead, like an adult, you’ll bottle up your feelings and let them blossom into cancer.
Libra: Murder-Suicide Pact
Consider the love stories of Romeo and Juliet, Bonnie and Clyde, and Sid and Nancy. While these are all heartbreaking tales of love too precious for this harsh, cruel world, they all have one thing in common: everyone involved was insane and in desperate need of counseling.
Libra, love isn’t the only thing you require. You’ll also need rationality to avoid dying like a sad sack of garbage in a co-dependent narrative book that only teenagers can understand.
Scorpio: Just Suicide
There’s nothing surprising about this. Scorpios aren’t afraid of death. Indeed, death (in some form or another) appears to follow them around their entire lives. Personal transformation, loss, and near-death experiences are all examples of near-death experiences.
Scorpios understand that dying is the same as being reborn, thus they’re not afraid. It may be necessary to take matters into their own hands while waiting for Death to make a move that drives a Scorpio insane.
Sagittarius: Climbing Everest, Like An Idiot.
I know you like to travel and try new things, and I’m not trying to sour your lemonade, but there are some things you can do without jeopardizing your life. You can go to places where you won’t get typhoid, jungle hemorrhoids, or cold.
Not that you’ll listen to me when you’re in the middle of your next vision quest. No, you won’t be satisfied until you’ve been starved to the point of cannibalism, so we can all see the next movie about you dying on a mountain. You dunderhead. I can’t stand you for long.
Capricorn: Faked Death To See Who Shows Up To The Funeral, Results Cause Aneurysm
Capricorn, you must quit caring what others think of you. It will be your demise. We all wear a society mask, but the problem about masks is that they are visible to everyone. The sooner you admit to being the acceptance-deficient creature you are, the sooner you will receive the unconditional love you seek.
Alternatively, you may spend your entire life never believing anyone truly loves you and testing your theory by faking your own death. Regardless of how many people show up, the consequences will kill you.
Aquarius: Alone
My mother is a Pisces. She viewed the movie “Frida” after her divorce and decided that if she ever married again, her husband would have to have his own home. That’s not how marriage works, but who am I to put a stop to the ambitions of a revolutionary artist like Nanny Baker? I just hope she’s prepared to die alone, because I’m planning on dying before I turn 40.
Take note, Aquarians: your priceless independence will transform your existence into that of a wild and free horse. It could also make your dying feel lonely.
Pisces: As A Human Sacrifice
If you don’t like feeling like a doormat, it’s been stated that you should get off the floor, but it would require you to like, move, and stuff. Codependency, Pisces, is defined by an agreement to work harder on someone else’s problem than they do. It’s not love, but in some settings, such as treatment centers or 12-step programs, it can pass for it. You’re up for it! This manner, you can die as a massive martyr, as you have lived.
Step into your power, Pisces, and put it to good use. Otherwise, it will be claimed by someone else.
(March 21st to April 19th)
For an Aries, the most typical last words are “Please hold my beer.” Their adventurous spirit is a desirable trait unless they do something spectacularly idiotic like riding a bicycle down a cliff or disappearing when visiting a new nation “It’s completely safe.”
(April 20th to May 21st)
A Taurus will perish doing something they believe they can do on their own but shouldn’t. Enjoy being crushed behind the bookshelf you thought you could move alone!
(May 22nd to June 21st)
Making friends with the wrong person will kill a Gemini. They’re so nice and upbeat that they see the good in everyone, even those who shout “bad for you.” While they claim to have good intuition, they’ll be killed by their mistaken faith in a friend’s fixer upper.
(June 22nd to July 22nd)
A Cancer will die of a broken heart or something equally pathetic. Their self-destructive tendencies come out when something very horrible happens. They’ll mope around till their resolve to keep going fades.
(September 23rd to October 22nd)
A Libra will die helping someone they care about. For example, one year there will be a flu shot shortage, and they will forego getting one out of the kindness of their hearts only to catch the flu and die.
(October 23rd to November 22nd)
In a quarrel with someone about something they’ve already forgotten about, a Scorpio will die. They’ll give instructions for their obituary to make it clear that they won.
(December 22nd to January 20th)
A Capricorn will die of old age on their deathbed, surrounded by all the people who have disappointed them throughout their lives so that they might be disappointed one more time.
(January 21st to February 18th)
An Aquarius will die at the expense of aiding someone in need. They’ll pick up a hitchhiker who appeals to their sense of duty and altruism, or they’ll get harmed rescuing someone from an accident. They’re the type of person you hope is nearby in an emergency.
(February 19th to March 20th)
While penning a poem on their iPhone notes or immersed in the words of whatever dreamy song is playing in their headphones, a Pisces will stray into traffic. They will perish as a result of their head in the clouds.
Is Pisces a death sign?
CINEMASCOPES (cinema + horoscopes) examines films through the prism of astrology and vice versa. The series, which is published in seasonal installments, looks at how astrology may be made understandable through film and how the energy of each astrological season can be applied to how we watch and make movies.
Our final Cinemascope takes place in the most delicate of all seasons. Honey Boy (2019) is still in theaters as this article is being written, with sensitive Pisces Noah Jupe crying a lot in a film that is virtually made to make you cry regardless. See it for yourself.
Pisces is the karmic wheel’s final sign, which I frequently refer to as “the fish.” “A dying sign.” Don’t let this depress you: death signifies change, transformation, and transcendence, not finality and endings. Pisces has a foot in the afterlife, which is amazing.
When we talk about particular signs, certain phrases spring to mind: “sex” for Scorpio, “eating” or “sleep” for Taurus, and “impulsive” for Aries. “Empathy” and “sensitivity” are two of Pisces’ most important terms. Pisces is a sponge that absorbs everything that happens around them. This is a lovely attribute, though carrying all of the world’s problems (and never being able to emotionally disconnect from them) can be a terrible load at times. We’re known for crying a lot.
Pisces are unhappy and worried about everything since they can’t contemplate causing harm to anyone or anything. This is why they have a reputation for trying to save people (some might call it a saviour-martyr complex), and why they are sometimes driven to unhealthy relationships in order to help a tormented soul. See also: Pisces In The Panic in Needle Park, Kitty Winn ignores her own misery in order to focus on Al Pacino’s demands (1971). This season, be careful not to overextend yourself, yet recognize the limitless depths of your own sensitivity.
“You can’t have more or less infinity, and you can’t compare two things to see if they’re ‘equally infinite.’ Love is the same way. Infinity simply is, and I believe love is the same way.”
Okay, the fact that Pisces are sensitive is universally known. Unfortunately, this reality has become a clich that we are all withering flowers. (Which we certainly are, but not mainly!) Being sensitive doesn’t have to mean being a pathetic cry-baby. Increased sensitivity might make a Pisces see regular life, with its commonplace, rooted cruelties, as terrifying.
From body horror pioneer David Cronenberg to Halloween aficionado Matthew Gray Gubler to Gomez Addams stars Oscar Isaac and Raul Juli (who share a birthday), Pisces are sensitive to the eerie and macabre because of their deep relationship to death. What makes you think they’re so fond of Scorpios? (I’m referring to you, Eva Mendes.)
Jordan Peele, who has made a name for himself by discovering horror in the mundane see Pisces in Get Out (2017) Us (2019), starring Pisces Lupita Nyong’o, and Daniel Kaluuya. (He’s also married to Chelsea Peretti, a Pisces!)
Pisces are generally mystical sorts, believers in the unusual and otherworldly they take it seriously and don’t belittle it, because to their great connection to the spirit realm. They recognize humanity’s power to know and understand everything, and they feel there is more magic out there than we realize. They’re most likely interested in astrology.
Watch Pisces directors like Luis Buuel and Pier Paolo Pasolini’s surreal work, or Laura Harring’s dream-world in Mulholland Drive (2001), or anything about spirit worlds, the afterlife, or places beyond our own experience and knowledge.
Kyle MacLachlan plays Special Agent Dale Cooper, a kind-hearted dream believer who arrives in Twin Peaks on February 24th, the Pisces season. Cooper possesses exceptional intuition, a deep passion for nature, and strong, emotional convictions about the importance of values such as kindness, goodness, and love. His Piscean enthusiasm is only tempered by the mysterious nature of his surroundings in Twin Peaks, a place where he feels immediately at ease (and soon considers moving to). “Harry, let me tell you about a dream I had,” only a Pisces would say in response to a query like “Who killed Laura Palmer?”
“Following a dream I had three years ago, I became greatly moved by the condition of the Tibetan people and felt compelled to aid them. I also realized after waking up from the same dream that I had obtained subconscious understanding of a deductive technique involving mind-body synchronization and the deepest level of intuition.”
Pisces season is quite easy, and it reminds me of the caterpillar-butterfly transformation cry, die, and evolve into a completely different being. Repeat the process. Because all Pisces desire to accomplish in life is change, they go through this process on a weekly basis.
Thank you for reading, from this Pisces writer, at the conclusion of our Cinemascopes series. The column may be gone, but we’ll be back in Aries season before you know it, reborn by its fres, distinct, newborn fire. On the other side, I’ll see you.
Is this a Pisces’ final life?
Neptune is the planet of dreams, illusions, compassion, spirituality, and art, according to astrology. The planetary ruler of Pisces is, of course, this enigmatic figure. Pisces’ energy, on the other hand, is much more than a lovely fairy tale or looking at the world through rose-colored glasses. This energy has an unearthly quality to it that isn’t always fantasy-related. As a reminder that all you need is love, Pisces is also a symbol of selflessness and sacrifice.
It’s no surprise that this mutable water sign dominates the feed because it represents your spiritual journey and return to the divine. Pisces’ symbol is two fish swimming in opposite directions, but it also represents the sign’s eternal duality. The one fish represents your spiritual growth as it moves into another dimension, while the other represents your human existence in the physical realm.
Pisces is the zodiac’s last sign, but that doesn’t make it any less important. Pisces is both God and humanity, and you can only achieve this level of consciousness once you’ve reached the end of your spiritual journey. Pisces is the sign.
What will be the richest signs?
We have discussed some of the zodiac signs with the lowest chances of finding wealth. Let’s look at some of the signals that indicate a high likelihood of being wealthy.
You may argue that anyone or any sign can become wealthy through inheritance or lottery winnings. However, you have no control over these situations because they are entirely dependent on luck.
We’re talking about wealth that comes from hard effort, patience, perseverance, and dedication. We’re talking about self-made millionaires and billionaires who didn’t have any support from their already wealthy parents.
In any case, this is a fantastic opportunity for us to learn more about riches from astrology.
Here are some of the star signs that are the most likely to become rich and successful because of their traits and characteristics.
VIRGO (August 23September 22)
Virgo, the maiden’s sign, is one of the zodiac signs with the best chances of financial success.
This is why. They are perfectionists by nature. They also do not accept mediocrity. They will examine every aspect of their work to see what needs to be better. They will reap the benefits if they take the time to make the necessary modifications. When a Virgo invests in something, their astrological gene causes them to become fascinated with perfection.
This is how they end up with a high likelihood of being wealthy in their businesses or jobs. They’re also quite decisive and pragmatic, which helps their chances.
2. SCORPIO (November 21 October 23)
The Scorpio’s chances of becoming wealthy are aided by passion and intuition. They will tap into their intuition and rely on it to know exactly how to make their company successful once they have discovered what they are passionate about in business.
Scorpio men and women are intuitive when it comes to marketing strategies. If they are not business owners and work for a major firm, they will know exactly how to get to the top.
Scorpios are secretive and intriguing creatures by nature. They will quietly study the techniques of their successful opponents and devise a creative approach to allow them to overtake them.
3. LEO (from July 23 to August 22)
Leos made the cut because their ingenuity and self-assurance will help them rise to the top. The lion is known for its pride, but one of their lesser-known characteristics is that they enjoy experimenting and inventing new ways to accomplish things.
They have exceptional communication skills. They know how to persuade people to take action, which is why many of them are CEO candidates. Leos will go to great lengths to achieve their objectives.
4. AQUARIUS (April 20 May 20)
Taureans are stubborn, patient, and hardworking people by nature. It’s no surprise, then, that Taurus is one of the most prosperous zodiac signs. When it comes to achieving their objectives, their tenacity will pay off.
Taurus will do whatever is required in order to achieve their objectives. They are also magnetic, intelligent, and sensible in their thinking.
5. CAPRICORN (December 22 through January 19)
Capriconians are overworked. However, they sometimes waste their time by working overtime in a lower-paying job that doesn’t warrant it. Capricorns, on the other hand, are unlikely to accept low-paying positions. They have a strong ambition to succeed because they refuse to settle for mediocrity.
Structure, organization, and anything relating to labor and business appeal to them.
ARIES (March 21 April 19) is the sixth zodiac sign.
The most unexpected candidate on our list of the wealthy and famous. Despite their lack of patience and persistence in pursuing their goals, Aries made the list.
Aries men and women are extroverts who are enthusiastic about their work. Their drive and willingness to take risks put them on the fast track to success.
While Arians aren’t known for their patience, they find methods to stay motivated when they’re pursuing their dreams. They may not be the kind to work ‘hard,’ but they do know how to work’smart,’ meaning they can find shortcuts to success.
And they are the indicators that you will most likely become wealthy and successful.
Let’s take a look at some of the reasons why these signs made the cut. To begin, this list includes all signs with an affinity for the earth element. Taurus, Capricorn, and Virgo are the signs. Earth is associated with wealth and material possessions. It’s no surprise that the element that governs materialistic objects and wealth appears in this list of signs.
The other trend you’ll notice is that none of the signs come from the element of air. This is because air is linked to communication and learning, but not to earning money or driving. You’ve probably heard the phrase “all talk and no action,” which is why there are no air signs on this list.
Scorpio, a water sign, is possibly the most surprising contender on this list. Water signs are not associated with qualities that lead to wealth. The same might be said for Aries, as fire signs are known for their impatience. However, Scorpio, Aries, and Leo have one thing in common: they are all driven and passionate. With determination and desire, you can achieve your objectives and boost your chances of becoming wealthy. Even though you work hard, you will not succeed until you have drive and desire.
Finally, if you are a successful CEO or business owner who is a Sagittarius, Libra, Aquarius, Pisces, Cancer, or Gemini, look at the rest of your birth chart. Perhaps your moon or rising sign is in one of the signs on this list. Those aspects of your birth chart will undoubtedly assist you in achieving success in your chosen field and becoming wealthy in the process.